Clearing the air...

I haven’t blogged in a few days. Not sure why I haven’t. I guess I am reconsidering why I am doing this. Examining my goal. It’s fun and all that. I like writing. But I want this blog to be my gift to you and I want it to mean something.

My goal, you see, is not to promote power but to expose it. To reveal, to anyone with a desire to know what it really is, how it works. I think the world will change when we all start to see through it.

I know these ideas are not always well received. Some of you are resentful. You don’t like the premise that power is a crappy way of interacting with people. I am painting your dream in grey and black. I am suggesting that to seek power is to seek the ability to use peoples’ needs against them.

It’s like my CSR class on chocolate and how it is picked by little kids in West Africa who have been abandoned by their parents because they cannot afford to raise them. So the plantation owners buy the little kids and use them for labour.

Sure they feed them and at least they have someplace to sleep, but knowing this, your chocolate never tastes sweet again.

Power is the emotional manipulation of people by using their needs against them. Without need, there is no power. It may be successful. But it is a bitter kind of success.

I am not trying to help anyone lose or gain power. If you want it, have it. In the end you only need to experience it once - use it once - to know the truth of it.

It is a rush. A temporary feeling of superiority. If you are lucky it lasts a few days. For most of us however, it lasts about five minutes. Sometimes, after you use it, people start to look at you differently. That’s when the truth sets in.

I am not innocent. I know how to use it. I have used it well. That’s where my knowledge comes from. I still use it sometimes. Sometimes I can’t stop myself.

Because of my experience and my post-dynamic self-examination, I know where it leads and how empty it is in the end. We want it so bad and we hate it when others have it.

When others use it on us – especially those we love – we lose our ability to trust.

But the only reason exposing power is unpleasant, is because you have been convinced that it is the only way for you to have what you want and be happy. You think without power you will never get what you want or be who you want. You will never be happy.

The problem with my exposee is that I kill off your dream and leave you without a sexy alternative.

That’s because the alternative will not leave you feeling like you are better than others. You won’t feel like your life is better. Like you are smarter and more capable. Like you are superior.

The alternative will leave you feeling good - just not better than others.

I want to expose power but I also want to remind you of something you may have forgotten. I want to give you that reminder.

You are a child of the universe. A gifted, talented, capable and resilient being. You are god incarnate.

We are all a little bit lost. A little confused. But you are a creative, infinite well of love.

The beauty of the whole experience is figuring out how to have what we want while we help everyone else get what they want too. Figuring out what you want is not simple. But if we want that great symbiotic experience of compassion, we need to be clearer about what we want and how we should get it.

We have spent thousands of years seeking and using power. And if we look we can see how it works and what it gets us. It’s not pretty. If we don’t recognize that it is not pretty, we will just keep using it. We will continue to delude ourselves into thinking that world is better because the right people have and use power.

But it is not. You don’t have to look long or hard to see it ain’t working.

So I will keep pointing out the obvious and sounding like a broken record - going on about choice, needs, abilities and the experience of control, influence and seduction.

I won’t do it to wreck your dreams. I will do it so that the accomplishment of your dreams can be fulfilling in the truest sense. I will do it because deep in me, I have the hope – the sure belief – that we all want something more than just getting a little power.

We want light. We want joy. We want redemption. We want creation. We want to find our way to the greatest experience this life can offer – happiness.

I hope that, in the end, this blog helps.

Vote Mob

Where did the week go?
Monday I had fifteen ideas for blogs but I only got one in...
Too much marking and too little thinking.

So Lets' Think.

Let's start the week off with a little motivation.

Vote Mobs. Yup, Vote Mobs.

What the hell is that?

Check it out by clicking the title of the blog today. Or click here. I like that one.

Or check out a new website that came up this week.

It's called shitharperdid.ca
Yup, that's what it's called.

Power to the people.

Define the topic and you define the discussion

Did you know that the major cable/telco's want to change your internet billing from flat rate to usage based so the more you use the internet the more you pay?

What will happen to your phone bill / internet bill? Going to College/Uni demands that you have lots o' access and use of the internet - you can't get an education without it now.

But it's not just school - everything is going online.

Will you avoid websites like youtube because it costs too much to use?
What will happen to your facebook time?
What will happen to the design of web pages? Will they become lean and without color and animated content?
How often will you check your email?

Or will it be like gas and you get forced to pay more just because the cronies can get away with charging you on the basis of a lie.

Oil companies buy their oil years in advance.
And the infrastructure that makes internet possible was installed decades ago.

Now I am not saying to vote for anyone in particular. I don't care how you vote. I just want you to understand power and know how it is being used on you.

But I am saying that you can define the issues if you try.

Go to facebook and visit the Harper,  Iggy,  Layton pages and post the questions you have about this. If someone already asked the question then Like the question or add a comment.

Ya know, the majority of voters (over the age of 40) don't care because they don't live on the their phone and laptop. But you do. You should be defining the issues. Let them know you want an answer.

In today's world of internet communications you can define the issues. It is way too easy to make a difference.

BTW I get emails from many political parties - it may be spam, but it keeps me aware.
Here is the email I got from the Green Party today.

The Green Party is the first political party to support a bold new OpenMedia.ca public engagement initiative. OpenMedia is inviting Canadians to bring political attention to the online communications crisis in Canada that has been largely ignored during the election campaign. The organization is asking political candidates to pledge their support for the Internet.

"The Greens are proud to be the first party to announce support for OpenMedia's proposition," said Green Party leader Elizabeth May. "The internet is critical for modern day citizen engagement and an integral part of our economic competitiveness. The Greens pledge to adhere to OpenMedia's Stop the Meter campaign on Internet access. We are committed to enhancing broadband access, competition, transparency and choice."

A decade of neglecting the Internet regulatory issue is stifling Canada's economy, global competitiveness, free expression and Canadians' personal budgets.

"A vote for the Greens is also a vote in support of open and democratic Internet access in Canada" said Emma Jane Hogbin, the Green Party Science and Technology critic. "Vote Green – vote for the internet."

Visit http://openmedia.ca/ to learn more about the initiative.

I don't know if their's is the best idea. I haven't really checked. I will later.

I just know you want to know. You should know. And if you don't, you should ask.

So ask. Knowledge is the most important power mechanism.

Choice Between

Check out Rick's Rant...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=225Mx6ya7SQ

Now this might get a little confusing, but stick with me. I promise you will get it in the end.


Choice Between is not choice. Not really. Not in any meaningful way.

Power is about Choice. Or more precisely, Choice is the target of all power dynamics.

Remember our power fundamentals? Based on how it works, Power should be defined as:

The control, influence or seduction of a Choice by an Actor through the application of an ability to help or hinder a need (requirement, desire or attachment) in the Subject, creating a motivating emotional experience in the mind.

That’s where Choice takes place – in the mind. So that must be where Power takes place. Looking at the external conditions and the objects used for power is a distraction from the real process. If we want to change our response to power we have to stay focused.

Power is about Choice.

To have power is to have the ability to impact the Choices of others. To overcome power is to make that Choice without regard to the power dynamic being experienced.

When power is simple, the Actor stands before the Subject and somehow communicates to the Subject that they must choose X. They cannot choose Y.

The Subject wants to choose Y. The Actor wants the Subject to choose X. So using their ability to impact the Subject’s needs, they create an experience of control, influence or seduction in the Subject and in this way the Subject experiences power.

Choice did not go away. It may appear to have gone away because the Subject’s needs are very compelling. But the Choice is still there.

More importantly - the Subject is very aware that the Actor just used Power. When you know it is happening it seems a little fairer.

Some people call this Power Over. Steven Lukes calls it the first dimension of power. It is the ability to determine the answer to a question: Do you choose X or Y?

But there is more going on here. If we look harder we can see two levels of power are going on. Two levels of Choice.

The Choice between X and Y is not real Choice. It is Choice Between.

A talented Actor will know that there are more choices than X and Y. In fact, Choices range from A to Z. But if we exercise power over the potential options for selection within the question there is another level of power. The difference is that you may not be aware that a second level of power was in play.

No fair.

You didn’t realize that you could have considered A to Z. But the Actor got you to think the only options were X and Y. You know what else you didn't know? That in the end, both options are acceptable to the Actor. They just had a preference.

Hmmmmm…very effective power.

If there is another level of Choice being hidden or assumed, there is another level of Power going on.

Lukes might call it the second dimension of power.

Good power players always make sure that you only have Choice Between - never Real Choice. This is where it gets both insidious as well as ridiculous.

If you don’t realize there is another level of Choice that the Actor has hidden from you, then you certainly won’t recognize the power dynamic when it is before you. You may not understand why you are feeling increasingly angry or afraid. But somewhere in your psyche you know power is at work. When an Actor can limit what you perceive as your list of possible Choices, they are showing a real aptitude for Power.

Power is bad enough when you see it going on. It’s just plain twisted (insidious) when you can’t even spot it.

Of course the levels can go deeper.

If neither the Actor nor the Subject realize that options A to Z are not the only options. In fact, there may be multiple sets of options like 1 to 10, and red to violet, as well as A to Z. Now both the Actor and the Subject are the victims of some deeper level of power put in play by other Actors.

Now we are into the third dimension of power.

But the dimensions can go on and on.

If you can see that unlimited options are being narrowed question by question, layer by layer, level by level, choice by choice, you will see how power in our society works.

Choice Between.

So your parents wanted you to go to business school not art school. So they told you that you were going to choose between Business College X and Business College Y. They preferred Business College X so they told you that they would pay for it if you went to College X but won’t pay for it if you go to College Y.

Simple one dimensional power? Nope - layers and layers.

You see the power but accept it because you think you have Choice - you get to pick the college.

That’s illusion. It’s Choice Between.

Notice how there was never a question about whether or not you would choose between Biz College or Art College. Nor is there a choice between College and University.

That’s the second dimension. Choice between Choice Between.

But wait. There’s more.

You never even realized that all of this assumed that you were going to spend the next few years in post secondary. Ever wonder if you should get more education at all?

Yup – Choice between, choice between, Choice Between.

Geeze, what if you wanted to become a hermit and live in the wilderness of the Yukon?

Not even a question to be discussed.

Every time the question that supports the previous question is hidden behind another question so it can't be perceived, let alone considered, you have another level of power. Every time the list of options is reduced, there is another level of power in play. Everytime Choice is converted to Choice Between.

Good News? With each level of question you perceive, you get closer to Real Choice – not Choice Between. So ask Why? Why this? Why now? Why here? Why?

Confusing? Not really. Well maybe a bit.:)

It's just like when you think you could only choose between the political parties that are attending a debate. Choice Between.

But the truth is, there is more to that Choice. The levels go deeper when you recognize that even if we include the parties that are not in the debate, those are not your only choices. Choice Between Choice Between.

Nobody told you, (and you never considered) you had real Choice. Anything is possible. Hec, if you wanted you could change the election completely. You could change elections forever.

You could form a political party for people under the age of 30.

Call it the Bloc Youth.

You could run candidates in every riding. Cause young people are everywhere ya know.

You could raise millions of dollars by asking for only $5 each from the nearly 5 million Canadian voters under the age of 30. You don’t realize that you know how to reach them quickly and effectively. You could communicate with every one of them because they are on facebook like you. And with 25 million bucks you post a lot of video on youtube and facebook.

And you don’t realize they would listen to you. They are just as disengaged as you because they are frigging sick and tired of the bullshit Choice Between that they get offered every election by people who have been manipulating them with Choice Between for over two decades.

And all those politicians look the same to them anyway.

Layers and layers of Choice Between has effectively tricked you into thinking that a choice between Harper and Iggy is some kind of real Choice.

But you think, Who cares? There are no meaningful choices for me. So why bother?

And so you don’t even make a Choice Between let alone create a Real Choice by asking Why? or even better, Why Not?

They win.

Bastards.




What are you going to do about it?

Roll over and take it again?

Information

As a mechanism of power, information is everything.

How can you ever make any kind of choice whatsoever without having all of the relevant information? We need information like we need air and water.

We are a beast that tries to think. We want to be logical in our decisions. We believe we are smart and rational. But the basis for that rationality comes from information.

We need information to be an active positive participate in the social world.

Some people go out of their way to share information. That is what I try to do with this blog and with my teaching. I want to show you what power really is so you can regain Choice.

Some people, like Bradley Manning. think the world can change when the truth is shared.

Steven Lukes calls it the three dimensions of power. You should check out what he says in his book - Power: A Radical View.

I call the illusion of choice, Choice Between.

It is not Choice in the real sense. It is only Choice Between the options allowed.

More later...

When is love real Love, and when is love all about power?

We had a quite a class tonight. Most of the students think I am nuts. Maybe I am. I just wanted to talk – real talk - about Love. Love as a mechanism of power and Love as Source of Being.


I feel like we didn’t finish the conversation so I am going to rant. Forgive me.

When is love just Love, and when is love all about power?

It is hard to find a time when we do not use love to get something else that we want. And that is using love for power.

Love Because. That’s what I call it. I love you because you are sexy. I love you because you make me laugh. I love you because I can trust you. I love you because you make me feel secure. I love you because you make me happy.

I love you because.

That is Love Because. And although many of us are content with Love Because, you can’t deny that is love being given to control, influence or seduce the choices being made by the other.

That is power. Textbook.

You get my love till you no longer think I’m sexy, make me laugh, are trustworthy, make me feel secure or are fun. When the “because” is no longer present, well then, the love will no longer be present.

That ain’t love. It’s power.

That’s when love is not about an ineffable feeling of complete connection and deep appreciation. That’s when Love is about getting what I want - Gifts. Sex. Security. Praise. – that’s power.

That means – you have to admit it now - Love Because is what we do most of the time.

Now you may want to start calling me all kinds of names like negative minded, cold hearted, pessimistic, cup-half-empty kind of guy. But the truth is, you couldn’t be more wrong.

I cannot claim to be the world’s great love giver. I know I am not the world’s great love receiver. I have spent a great deal of my life – wasted a great deal of my life – on Love Because. I have given Love Because. I have accepted Love Because.

And I apologize to all those to whom I have said “I love you” but really meant – I love you because you give me what I want right now.

I know I have missed out on love because I was fixated on getting some Love Because.

Love Because is good because it satisfies Needs. (Requirements – Desires - and Attachments) Love Because is accepted because we are short sighted, filled with fear and trapped in the illusion part of our lives.

No, please do not call me Negative Nelly. The truth is you will never meet a bigger romantic. I want real love more than anything. Anything. More than money. More than security. More than fame, fortune and baseball.

And I know it is possible.

But first I have to shed my power based view of the world. I have to see through my needs. I have to forgive my self.

I have to…

Stop asking for this in exchange for that.

Stop trying to make someone love me.

Stop thinking that I am only loveable because…

I have to put real love in my life and draw more of it to me.

I have to Love.

Oh yes my friends, love is real. More real than anything else. In fact nothing else would exist but for the truest form of love - the real-thing kind of love.

But I am also a guy who has been cursed with a clear view of power. It’s how we live. Churning power in everything all the time. Constantly trying to get others to fulfill our needs.

To be nice I would say I am a realist. To others I am just a pain in the ass.
I know that I am as much to blame – if we have to talk about blame – as anyone else for my lack of love. I blame no one but myself. That is where the blame belongs - on ourselves. You can’t blame someone else for that one.

Sorry.

I want real deep connected love. Nothing short of that will satisfy me. I have had tastes. Little samples of what is possible. I cannot give up that hope. That kind of love is our birthright.

I see life not for what I want it to be. Nor do I try to see the bright side. Shit is shit. Some people have grown to like shit. In fact some of the great positive minds have convinced themselves that shit is good. So be it. I understand. Love Because is safer. It's easier. It's simpler.

But they can have it.

I, on the other hand, am seeking the deepest of connections. The Oneness that is possible and will be my experience someday.

Care to join me?

Fundamentals

Power is about the control, influence or seduction of a choice.


Thanks for your help. Traffic here at the blog has been growing steadily for a few weeks now.
I hope I am giving you meaningful ideas that are helping your lfe.

Understanding power, when every interaction in our lives is power-based, is a very useful thing.

I have been responding to questions - please send me more!
Either here, or on facebook.
I hope you have found the questions and the answers interesting.
You do me a big favor by indicating what you think of the posts at the bottom.
It is my dream that you come back again and again and each time you come here you find something that helps you live your life.

That would make my life worthwhile:)
Now you know my need, feel free to use it for power.

I want to thank Stu for challenging some of the thoughts. It is in dialogue that we find the truth.

I have been concerned that some people who are not connected to the college or the course are interested in the topic but are unclear about the lexicon we use here. So I have decided to re-run some posts from the early days of the blog. They explain the concepts and insights.

Click the link below or the title of this blog and it will send you back in time to past posts. Please ask the questions that they stimulate - I only want to help:)

Over the next few days I will cover the fundamentals - let me know if you enjoy it.

http://onhavingpower.blogspot.com/2005/09/control-is-illusion.html

After you read that post come back here and let me know if it was worthwhile.
Talk soon...

Unthinkable

Speaking of movies...

I just watched a movie recommended to me by one of the power students - Shaun.

Unthinkable

It is upsetting and disturbing and all too real for comfort...
and exactly like any real power dynamic.

I will leave it for you to watch the movie but I will place a little suggestion in your mind before you watch it. That way you will see the two lessons in the movie.

There are always two sides to every power dynamic - always. It is the bi-polar nature of power. Every actor is a subject and every subject can be an actor if they are willing.

And...

The power dynamic will always go to the one who feels their need the least.

In other words the real determinate of a power dynamic is the perception of how bad you require, desire or are attached to, the need in play.

That's why we see needs as weaknesses and we are unwilling to share our deep desires or fears. That way the other person won't know how much power they really have.

Good movie - thanks Shaun:)