Power isn't magic. But we use a little misdirection to keep people thinking it is.
If we really want to understand the dynamics of power – the way we get others to choose to do, say or think what we want them to do, say or think – we need to shift our attention from the Actor to the Subject.
There is a common myth about power that keeps many of us living as Subjects.
People are powerful.
This isn’t so. It is myth. I call it myth because it is an ancient belief that we use to explain what we do not understand.
The real problem with this myth is that it leads us to misunderstand the whole process of control, influence or seduction. It points us in the wrong direction. It causes us to focus on the Actor thinking that there is something about them that is inherently powerful.
People do not have power. It is not something you can have. It is something that you use.
People use power. Some people are good at using it. Some people understand it and use it on a regular basis. But when they use it, their focus is not on themselves. Their focus is on the Subject. The Actor recognizes something in the Subject.
So…we ask …What do they recognize?
Need.
They recognize that the Subject has a requirement, a desire or an attachment.
It is true that people who use power have something. But it is not power per se. It is an ability to use something to help or hinder that need that they recognize in the Subject.
That ability might be the ability to use money, or authority, or physical strength.
But it does not matter what the Actor has the ability to use, unless the Subject has a need that can be helped or hindered by that ability.
The Actor has no power unless needs are recognized in the Subject and the Actor has an ability to address that need.
The source of power is not money, authority or brute strength. The Source of power is need.
You can’t bribe a rich man.
The power does not reside in the Actor. It resides in the need of the Subject.
We would miss this if we were to always focus on the Actor as a “powerful person.”
Ignore the myth and shift your focus.
Shift your focus and see through the misdirection. You will discover the source of all power: the need in the Subject.
